Following a recent entry, I’ve received several follow up comments on the topic of success.  If you enjoyed the Will Smith interviews, I’m guessing that you will enjoy these videos as well.  Richard St. John has some interesting things to say about becoming successful and remaining successful.

First, he shares eight keys to success.

He then comments on success as a continuous journey.

At first glance, much of his material appears obvious. There are times though when we overlook what is obvious advice.  Although you may not learn anything new, you will certainly be reminded of several important concepts.

It is well known that not everyone in the world has the interest or ambition to become successful (ex. at school, work, sport, etc.).  If you do wish to excel however, you’ll find much of St. John’s advice to be highly relevant as you move closer towards your goals.

Giuliano Stroe was discussed on my forum several months ago, but it wasn’t until this week that he became an Internet sensation. Earlier in the week, his story was featured on numerous sites including Yahoo. Within a matter of days, my inbox has filled with emails about the young boy.

The messages that I’ve read indicate that there are mixed feelings regarding his development. Some parents labeled his upbringing as child abuse, while others asked how they could train their own children similarly. Some even thought I was training my kids like Giuliano. Based on the confusion and influx of questions, it is time to address the topic.

To begin, I am not here to judge this boy or his family. I know nothing about them other than what I’ve seen on a brief Youtube clip. I’d like to believe that this child is a young phenomenon. I hope that he isn’t being pushed to do something against his will. My comments within this entry do not apply to him specifically, but rather the broad topic of childhood development. It’s also worth noting that I am obviously impressed by Giuliano‘s ability.

Yet despite his ability, I hope that other parents do not try to replicate his early success. Kids need a chance to be kids. They need a chance to play and enjoy childhood. They should not be forced to exercise or train. Some may counter these statements by saying that it is better for a child to exercise than sit in front of the television.  I agree with this statement, but it is still just a partial response.  Almost any activity is better than sitting in front of the television.  What about practicing the alphabet, learning to count, learning to read and write, playing a musical instrument, working on various art projects, learning to become self sufficient, and learning to behave with proper manners.  Why doesn’t anyone mention these other pertinent tasks?   Childhood development includes much more than hanging from a pull-up bar. In my opinion, physical development ranks nowhere near the top of the priority list. Children must also advance socially, emotionally, cognitively, etc.

Over the years, I’ve met several young adults who were pushed into sports by their parents. After early success, they eventually burned out, and some even rebelled against their parents. Not only did their athletic pursuits fail, now they are dealing with damaged relationships that go far beyond the playing field. Many also deal with social problems. After years of being pushed and told that their best isn’t good enough, these young men are socially challenged, confused, and lacking in confidence. The candle that burns twice as bright often burns half as long.

Leading vs. Forcing

I have a three year old son and a 16 month old daughter. As I mentioned recently, they both love to play in the gym. They have been around professional athletes since day one. It is normal for them to see fighters at the house training. My son still thinks that everyone is a boxer. It’s the lifestyle that they have grown up around.

I never force my children to do anything however. They are far too young to be pushed into any physical activity. When my son comes to the gym, he is there to play. I don’t make him do anything. He keeps himself busy by copying those around him or creating his own games. Just the other day, he was playing a game with a pile of sandbags. He would climb to the top and then jump down to a punch shield. When I asked what he was doing, he said that he was pretending to jump to an island that was surrounded by alligators. It was all a big game to him. He laughed and giggled the entire time.

Leading by example is far different than forcing a youngster to perform an activity. Children imitate their parents. If you are active, there is a good chance that your children will follow the lead.

Children Are Not Financial Investments

I’m sure many who read this entry are familiar with the Richard Sandrak story. Refer to the clip below if a refresher is needed.

As a young boy, Richard’s father was suspected of mixing steroids in with his supplements. The family then launched a supplement line, using the young boy’s picture to market the product line. Soon after, Richard’s father was jailed for assaulting the boy’s mother. It was not until his father was jailed that Richard was allowed to socialize with children his own age. Fortunately, Richard appears to be doing well now. It is sad though that any child would be raised in a manner that prevented him from playing with friends his own age.

After all, what happens if a child prodigy is injured? What if he doesn’t make it? There are far more failures than success stories. What happens then? Why aren’t parents spending as much time encouraging their toddlers to read and write? Could it be that some parents are living out their dreams through their children? Could it be that a father who didn’t make it wants to capture fame and fortune by living vicariously through his child?

It is pathetic to live your dreams through a child by forcing him into specific activities. You had your own chance at life. It isn’t your right to live out another life through your child. Leading from the front is different than abandoning your responsibility as a loving parent. If your child is destined to become a champion athlete, it will happen in time. You don’t need to jump start the process at age 3. Hanging from a pull-up bar at 3 isn’t going to be the deciding factor between success and failure when he is 18 years old.

Toddlers have limited attention spans. Any toddler who is training for hours on end is being forced to do so. I don’t care if he is smiling or not. Even terrible two toddlers have moments when they laugh or smile. That doesn’t mean they are doing something by choice. There is reason why almost every toddler class in existence is an hour or less. The last thing that anyone wants is a crowded room filled with over tired toddlers.

It is also worth noting that children advance exponentially in short periods of time. The difference between my son at age 2 and 3 is incredible. There are often significant changes in just a month or two.  Each month my daughter is able to say and do things that she couldn’t the month before.  It is incredible to witness.  Encouraging a child to work hard at a little league practice (in a sport that he chose) is far different from forcing your child to do something as a toddler. The difference between a 3 and 9 year old child could be calculated in dog years. It isn’t even close.

Final Thoughts

Personally, I don’t care if my children become future world champions or future piano players. I’ll support whatever it is they aspire to become.  If I can help, I will do everything in my power to assist, but I will never force them to do anything. My children are not financial investments. On the contrary, having children has only motivated me to work harder than ever before. My primary objective in life is to care for my children. I’d rather work hard so they can have a better life. I would never look to my child as a way to cash in.

Lastly, I’m not here to raise your kids. I am simply sharing my own thoughts on the general subject, but I can’t imagine that anyone would argue against letting a kid be a kid.

As a father of two, I’m amazed at how physically active children are by nature. My three year old son would play outside all day if we let him. He loves to run, jump, climb, wrestle, ride his bike, hit the bag, and throw the ball.

He often tags along at the gym and keeps himself busy by making up his own games and “moves” (as he calls them). When it is time to pack up and leave, he does his best to delay the exit. He always looks to extend the gym stay by a few more minutes.

My 15 month old daughter is following closely in his footsteps. One of the first things she wanted to do after learning to walk was put on her brother’s gloves and hit the punching bag. She was obsessed with her big brother’s gloves. My wife and I finally broke down and bought her a pair to help keep the peace.

She now brings the gloves and mitts to me. She smiles and laughs as she plays with them. And just like her big brother, she too is sad when it’s time to put them away. I’ve learned to distract her when it is time to clean up, otherwise she would keep the gloves on all day.

Lead By Example

I am not writing this entry to suggest that we push our kids to become champion athletes. If my kids want to play sports when they are older, I will support them, just as I’ll support them if they want to play the piano instead. I will never push them towards something they don’t enjoy.

Yet based on my own observations, it is clear that children imitate their parents. Their view of normalcy is based on what they encounter each day at home. I happen to be in the business of training fighters. My kids have seen fighters training here, and at the gym since day one. They are surrounded by a gym scene. It is both normal and fun to them. I first bought my son boxing gloves so he would stop taking dirty gloves out of the gym. He wanted to imitate what he saw around him. My daughter now imitates her big brother.

When my son was two, I asked him what he wanted for Christmas. He asked for a pull-up bar. Initially, I thought I misunderstood what he had said. But in fact he wanted a bar to imitate what he saw at the gym. Almost a year later, my son and daughter both pull at my leg to ask for a turn on the bar. We can’t get upstairs without one of them asking.

My kids find these physical activities enjoyable. I’ve never asked or pushed them to do anything. Kids by nature do what is fun. They will not actively do something that they do not enjoy. It is their nature to seek out and do what they find fun.

Responsibility

As a parent, it is my responsibility to prepare my children for the world around them. I don’t care whether they participate in sport or not, but it is important to foster physical, mental, and social development.

Unfortunately, many parents seem to believe their responsibility ends in the bedroom. I’ve met parents whose idea of entertaining their children is to sit them in front of the television. They don’t want to be “bothered” playing with their kids. They are too busy to play, yet oddly enough find time to update Facebook, track their favorite sporting teams, and keep up with their favorite television shows.

How do kids go from laughing and playing at the park to becoming sedentary, overweight teens and adults? It certainly isn’t natural. By nature, humans were born to move. Unfortunately, as children grow older, they are often encouraged to do otherwise. It’s easier to plop your kid in front of the TV as opposed to taking him outside to ride his bike or throw the ball.

Clearly, there are other causative factors, but the inactivity of our children is without question a contributor to the continuously increasing rate of adult obesity. Consider the link below for some recent statistics:

The Cost of Treating Obesity

It is sad to think that children who by their own accord would gladly run around all day will eventually become overweight adults. All too often parents look elsewhere for solutions, rather than taking a moment to ponder their own responsibilities. No one is more responsible for a child than the parents. It isn’t the responsibility of the school or government to develop a healthy child. Parents must take it upon themselves. The ability to freely move and enjoy the world around is something that all kids should enjoy. No parent should deprive their children of this simple pleasure.

We as parents need to take it upon ourselves to foster an active lifestyle for our children. Making time for active play is the most enjoyable part of my day. I wouldn’t trade those smiles for anything in the world.

I’m amazed at what many consider to be such a complex topic (ex. childhood obesity) is actually so easy to correct.  The first step is for parents to begin leading from the front.  Is that really too much to ask?  I can’t think of anything more important (to me) than my children and their health.  How could any parent think differently of their own children?

Parents need to wake up and take matters into their own hands.  They must put their children first and stop making excuses about what the world owes them.   They should instead worry about what they owe their children.

Last week I came across a camel jumping video that had been posted to the forum.  I later posted a similar video to  Facebook.  It didn’t take long for the humorous comments to follow.  I myself found it a bit amusing.  Something about jumping over a row of camels struck me as funny.

Fortunately, I’m not here to suggest that we all construct life size paper-mâché camels to increase our vertical.  I do however believe that there are valuable lessons that can be taken from these Yemen jumpers.

First, take a look at a few demonstrations.

Read more

A recent study suggests that 1 out of 5 children (age 4) are obese.

Study finds 1 in 5 obese among 4-year olds

As stated within:

The study is an analysis of nationally representative height and weight data on 8,550 preschoolers born in 2001. Children were measured in their homes and were part of a study conducted by the government’s National Center for Education Statistics. The results appear in Monday’s Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine.

Researchers then went on to estimate the following:

Overall, more than half a million 4-year-olds are obese…

Life As A Parent

If I read this story 5 years ago, I would have likely skimmed over it and moved on without much thought.   It’s not that I would have wished obesity on any child, but it simply wasn’t a topic that I followed closely before having children of my own.

I am now a proud father of two wonderful children.  There is no denying that life changes after becoming a parent.  My life now revolves around caring and providing for my children.  If they hurt, I hurt.  They mean everything to me.  I can’t imagine ignoring their health and well being.  Even the best legal counsel in the world couldn’t sway me to believe it is acceptable to allow children to eat themselves to obesity.

No Excuses!

Since reading this article in the news yesterday, I’ve already seen arguments defending those parents whose children are overweight.   At the top of the list, many have highlighted the troubled economy.  Their argument is that it is too expensive to consume healthy foods such as fruits and vegetables.

Nonsense!

Yes, the economy has gone down the gutter as of late, but even tough times don’t give us a reason to overfeed our children.  Does anyone actually believe that a poor economy somehow justifies obesity?  Are we really that pathetic as a nation?  What happened to stepping up and taking some responsibility?  Times have certainly changed…

My mother raised two kids on her own.  We certainly weren’t wealthy.  That didn’t stop her from picking out what foods we ate.  My brother and I didn’t do the shopping.   Our voting rights were not recognized.  We weren’t in charge.  My mother ran the show.  She bought the food.  She cooked the food.  We ate the food.

Yes, we had snacks, but there were rules in place in terms of what and when snacks were allowed. For example, we were allowed to pack one snack with lunch.  That was it. I can remember telling my mother that the other kids had more than one snack with their sandwich.  She would respond by reminding me that I’m not one of the other kids.  She was not about to give in.

Looking back, I’m glad my mother took care of us the way that she did.   She is all the proof that I need to completely discredit the economy as a viable excuse for obesity.  My mother was (and still is) a very strong woman, and we certainly learned from her example.  She did everything in her power to take care of us and I’ll never be able to thank her enough.

Priorities

We can’t blame a poor economy for nationwide obesity.  Personally, I already run a very small business and the slow economy hasn’t helped.  Tough times don’t mean that I’ll start stuffing my kids with crap however.   We still do our best to purchase and consume healthy foods.  It’s all about priorities.  I’d rather cut back in other areas.  Nutrition and health are at the top of my priority list when it comes to spending.

Furthermore, what happened to kids getting outside to play?   I practically lived outside as a kid.  That’s all we ever wanted to do.  No one wanted to sit inside and watch television.  It’s natural for kids to get outside and play.  It isn’t natural to sit inside and watch Elmo re-runs all day.

Is it really too much for parents to get off their ass and play outside with the kids?  You can go to the park for free.  Throw a ball in the yard.  Take your kids for a walk.  Go for a bike ride.  Find something that you can do together. I cherish the time with my kids.  I’d play outside all day if I could.  My son would too.  He was in the gym with me last night and asked me to build him a sandbag.  He’s not even 3 and he’s already trying to lift our sandbags.  He follows my lead.  He sees that his parents are active and he wants to join in on the fun.  When you lead, your kids will follow.

Ignorance

Another common excuse is lack of knowledge regarding various health related topics.  I don’t buy into this excuse one bit however.  I have no sympathy for parents who complain that they don’t know what foods are healthy for their children.   Does the word “Google” ring a bell?  How about you turn off American Idol and instead do some research regarding your child’s health?  Bookstores are also great.  You can even go to the library and check out books for free!

No one really knows anything about being a parent until it happens.  There isn’t an instructional book that you can follow step by step.  My wife and I read everything that we can find regarding the development of our children (ex. cognitive, social, physical, etc.).  Infants aren’t able to make decisions on their own.  We as parents must assume the role.

If you have time to make a child, you better have time to take care of the child.  No one is born with answers.  Parents need to actively search for answers.  If my kid has a problem and I don’t know how to fix it, you can be damn sure that I will not stop looking until I can.

Lastly, I’ve never seen a child become obese overnight.  It’s a gradual process.  It’s not as if obesity breaks out like a rash.  It takes time. Parents have the ability (and time) to make changes before obesity robs their children of their health and vitality.

We need to stop coddling ignorant parents as if they were the toddlers.  Parents need to step up to the plate and stop making excuses.  I’m beyond disgusted with this entire topic.  I can’t imagine where we’ll be in another 20 years.  I can only hope that my prediction is wrong.

Below is a video clip that includes still images of several well known strength athletes from past eras.

For those interested, the video creator has listed photo references within the Youtube  description.   Among the list includes one of my favorite sites (Sandowplus).

The Old School

I often reference material from the Sandow Plus site.  As I’ve said before, many of the greatest strength discoveries came long before our time. Contrary to what today’s market would like you to believe, strength isn’t new.  In fact, many of the feats performed by past strength athletes are seldom replicated today.

This assertion will come as a surprise to certain readers.   We live in a fast paced world where technological breakthroughs occur each day.  It isn’t uncommon for us (people) to assume that everything we are doing now is better than how it used to be done.   The industry then plays into this belief.  Everyone wants fast results, so the market attempts to satisfy this demand.  It is more profitable to fulfill a need, rather than telling the truth.  A quick Google search is all that is necessary to confirm my beliefs.  It took but a matter of seconds for me to find programs promising rapid strength gains, rapid weight loss, and 30 day miracles.

It isn’t marketable to suggest that you’ll need years to develop truly impressive results.  Who wants to wait years when a supplement or book says that we can do it in a few weeks?

The Truth

Unfortunately, so-called breakthroughs are often everything but breakthroughs.  More often than not, we simply play into the old belief that what’s new is old, and what’s old is new, again and again.   Take a look through Sandowplus.co.uk and you’ll find almost every “new” exercise from today’s era has been performed for longer than you’ve been alive.

This isn’t to say that we shouldn’t strive to improve on the past, but rather a reminder that the wheel has already been invented.  I’m also not suggesting that you can’t make gains in a short period of time.  I am however suggesting that truly impressive gains take time.   It is important to approach your training with this understanding.   I encourage ambition, but I also encourage realism.

Real strength requires strong ligaments, tendons, etc.  This process doesn’t take place in a week or a month.  Real time must be invested for real strength.  The old time strength athletes were patient.  Legends weren’t built in weeks or months.  They were developed over years of consistent and focused work.

Furthermore, let’s not forget that the amazing strength feats from the past occurred long before the multimillion dollar supplement industry existed.   I’m not suggesting that supplementation cannot be useful, but don’t be confused into believeing that you “need” certain products to improve.  Need is a grossly overused word in today’s industry.  All that you really need is an intelligent, consistent, dedicated, and patient effort.

The Modern Industry

Today’s industry would like you to think otherwise.  Quick results are often promised.  If a particular program doesn’t offer quick results, the user abandons it as fast as he found it.  This cycle often continues over and over again.  Program jumpers hop from program to program, ignorant to the fact that their inability to see something through is the only real problem.  It isn’t actually their fault however.  The industry has brainwashed many to believe that serious results can come overnight.

I receive hundreds of emails each week, so I have a general idea of what many are thinking.  Last night, I had 17 year old athlete email me in frustration.  He’s been lifting with his team and is upset with his lack of progress.  After inquiring about his program, I soon realized that he’s only been lifting for one month.   That’s right… just one month!!!

He wanted to know what supplements he could take to speed his gains.  I wish I could say that his email was unusual, but I’ve actually grown accustomed to it.  He’s one of many victims to the marketing powers that exist among us.  He isn’t the first to fall into the trap.  In his mind, if he isn’t ripping through new shirts in 30 days, something must be wrong.

The World Has Changed

I’m only in my 30’s and the world has already changed significantly since my time as a child.   I didn’t know what the Internet was until I was in college.  When we had papers to write, we went to the library to do the research.  We flipped through old encyclopedias looking for answers.  Book reports meant that you actually had to read the book, rather than typing a few search queries on Google.

I still remember when we had rotary phones.

Now I see young kids with cell phones.

Many of the younger readers will be shocked to know that television stations used to go off the air at night.   And when the television was on, there weren’t any remotes.  You’d get a few channels, and you’d need to manually change the channel by walking to the TV and adjusting the dial.  Now, you can sit back and impatiently flip from channel to channel.

I remember when the Atari 2600 first came out.  It’s no wonder why we went outside instead of playing video games.

Yes, the world has changed.  We’ve grown used to finding answers while sitting behind the keyboard.  We communicate online.  We  shop online.  We perform research online.  Almost everything is available through a click of the mouse. We are all used to it.  I’m no different.  I get irritated when my Internet connection is slow.  To think that it’s only been a few years since I was connecting through a slow dial up modem.

Separate The Body From Technology

I welcome the advances in technology, but I also realize that the human body must be kept separate from our fast way of thinking.  The body isn’t new.  We’ve been around for a long time.  Real change requires real time.  Shortcuts usually turn into dead ends.  We can’t gain strength behind the keyboard.  You still need to get up and put in the work.  The old timers didn’t need any of the fancy gadgets that you’ll find today.  Looking back in time is all the proof that you need to determine what you actually do need.

Stay consistent, stay determined, and the results will come.  Ironically, slow and steady is often the fastest and most productive route.